Saying a farewell to complaining about my small boobs and untoned abs.
You know the scene from Mean Girls, where The Plastics huddle around a mirror talking about all the things they hate about their bodies? Regina George has man shoulders, Gretchen has a weird hairline, and Karen’s hips are huge. And after putting the spotlight on all of their problems, they turn their attention to Caty to which she simply joins in by saying she has bad breath in the morning. Well, for one, if you don’t remember this scene, I’m convinced you’ve been living under a rock or you were born last night. Anyway, my point of recounting Lindsey Lohan’s glory days, is to suggest that this scene is in fact how most girls live out their lives.
Why do we make a group activity out of body complaining?
In fact, this past Thursday a couple friends and I decided to hit this popular 90s-themed party that we heard so much about. After throwing back a couple glasses of wine, because let’s be honest, I’m old and can’t hold shots down like I used to, we started to get dressed. Shedding our clothes on the floor around us, everyone quickly grabbed chunks of their bodies, pointing out our flaws. My boobs are way to small. One girl’s stomach was too fat, another’s thighs looked too thick. We sat there, arguing about who had the most problems and who didn’t need to worry about anything, because they were actually perfect. It went on for almost ten minutes until, like most girl talks, switch to another pressing topic.
Although I can say that all of us are confident women, in this moment we had become Plastics. No one was a Caty Heron. Why do we make a group activity out of body complaining?
It’s normal to have insecurities and even to focus on them, but it doesn’t mean it’s something to celebrate.
Realistically, every woman has at least one insecurity. Our jaw line could be better, hair could be longer or curlier, a butt could be plumper, or a stomach could be slimmer. It’s normal to have insecurities and even to focus on them, but it doesn’t mean it’s something to celebrate. And actively complaining about them as a girl time chat couldn’t possibly be a way of creating a body positive environment in the room and inside your head.
Admittedly it’s hard to not join in the discussion when everyone has something wrong with them. But if we turn so much attention on not bullying and poking fun at other’s insecurities, why wouldn’t it be a good idea to direct that spirit towards ourselves? Everyone has too much of something or not enough of the other. Some things we can change, some stay forever. But for all the flaws they’re so many greats things about my body that I love. I like my soft skin and my overall frame. So maybe it’s time we said goodbye to the body complaining and when confronted with a similar conversation, be more like Caty. I’m sure everyone’s breath is gross in the morning.