Fuck what you think. I wear what I want.
It is truly a battle for a girl to find a personal style that is truly hers. It takes experimentation, trial and error, and a lot of bad outfit choices before she finds a style that encompasses who she thinks she is and how she would like to express that to the rest of the world. Since eighth grade, I’ve gone through a series of weird style decisions. I tried out a rocker, Ashley Simpson inspired fashion style, a bohemian look, and even an eclectic 80s style with a pair of awful green skinny jeans. But just as most trends do, these looks all seemed to fade away with the time.
Should i be nice and explain to people what I was wearing or should I reply “clothes” with a subtle fuck off undertone?
As I started to stumble upon a style that fit my personality – to which I still can’t really label under any one category – I received a ton of feedback on what I was wearing or how I paired one piece with another. “What are you wearing?” was one of the many questions I would get. I would always go back and forth with the imaginary devil and angel on my shoulder: should i be nice and explain to people what I was wearing or should I reply “clothes” with a subtle fuck off undertone? Sad to say, I usually kept it PG and explained the outfit choice. And always, I would wish I saved my breathe because my explanation was followed by an unwanted opinion about how they didn’t really think it was a right choice.
As I moved into high school and even my first years in college, people always had something to say about what I was wearing. They would tell me if they liked it, whether they hated it, or anything else that jumped into their minds. I can’t say that I ever took into great consideration what people said about my style; I never grew sad or discouraged from their comments, but there were times I held back. For example, there was this grey cloak/cardigan I used to wear a lot when I was eighteen. It sounds like a rendition of a Harry Potter costume, but it was cute I promise. Anyway, after wearing it a couple times, I received a lot of feedback about how awful it was. It even became a full discussion at one point. I casually laughed off the negative comments, but I sort of internalized what people were saying. So after that day, I stopped wearing it around school; I only wore it when I was going to places like the mall.
I made a conscious decision to ignore what people had to say about my style – after all, it was my style.
After that specific incident, I made a conscious decision to ignore what people had to say about my style – after all, it was my style. When I reflect on my earlier years dressing, I realized I had gotten to this look because none of the other styles I had tried felt right. I had tried dressing the way others did. I had tried mimicking celebrity styles and following trends down to the accessories, but looking in the mirror, I felt like a fake version of the people or things I was mimicking. I realized that the style and clothes I rock now are an exact representation of the person I want to convey to the rest of the world. So what if some of the comments were negative; I received a lot more positive feedback from people whose style also stood outside the lines and from whom I admired. That outweighed any of the negative. Even the positive feedback didn’t resonate with me for that long because no one’s opinion mattered but mine; I was happy with the my style.
It took me a total of six years to find a style that was 100 percent mine and I wasn’t going to let go of it just because people thought I should. The thing is, people will always have something to say, but let them talk. Your style is a way of expressing yourself without words; it’s a visual depiction of emotion and personality. So allowing people to get in my head and alter my style so much to the point that I refused to wear a cardigan in most places, only took away from my expression and restricted people from seeing all of me. Nevertheless, I’m happy to say I don’t care what anyone has to say now. And I’ll wear that cardigan anywhere I want to.